i just had my meal so i cant sleep just as yet even thou i should really be in bed by now.. so instead.. im blogging..

today, was such a messy and tiring day cuz of all the rushing around and the crowd of doctors during exit rounds.. the was crazy cuz we got whole mixture of disciplines this time round instead of the usual majority of DIM cases.. so there were the onco drs, respi drs, dim drs, endo drs and wad not.. lose count already.. so many drs.. so messy i cant stand it.. case notes everywhere, this dr asking for something that dr asking for another thing, pts, drs and even the irritating ward clerk all taking turns using the ward phone!!! urgh!! how am i supp to get my work done when i need to use the phone too??!! i need to arrange the ambulance, inform the relatives, call the team drs blah blah blah.. stupid irritating clerk who hates everyone and the stupid phone and computer to herself and shoos everyone outta her way.. IRRITATING MONDAY!!!!

to make things worse, stupid fucking respi doctor who probably din take her psy meds today was shouting and scolding us!! hello bitch! if you need us to get something for, pls do us a favour and at least be polite about it.. you asked my partner to get the things ready for you.. 5 mins later you ask me to get ready for you.. do you noe how irritating it is when someone else is already preparing and you ask me to prepare.. its like wasting my bloody time when i could have doing other things.. just bloody wait can! and dun accuse us of not properly preparing the trolley the right way because we only brought wad you told us to bring.. so you only yourself to blame for the lack of PROPER instructions.. you failed the procedure the first time round.. did anyone blame you.. no.. in fact we even helped you order the STAT drug the 2nd time round.. so pls respect us for doing everything we can to make it quick.. for some bloody 50 ml syringe we had to run up and down the bloody ward looking for the sister.. sister not around wad can we do??!! its not as if we are the ones holding the key to the special cupboard.. farnie thing is even you noe that the key is held by the sisters and yet you scold us.. seriously wtf! i had enuf of you man.. scolding us students for nothing.. so wad if we dunno wad the procedure is.. thats up to you to teach us isnt it.. wad happened to imparting to knowledge and sharing wad you noe.. certain things cant be taught in school.. even my own SNs dunno and they had to print out the procedure and read so we now wads gng on.. you are just a freaking MO!! not a consultant, reg or a prof! you have no freaking right to scold or shout at us.. and when veron told you to stop scolding us students, you could even tell me in my face that the anger was not directed at me but at my SN.. then wtf is ur prob.. if you have a prob with my sn, go and deal with her! im not ur punching bag damn it! i noe you are upset cuz the procedure failed the first time round and you have to redo it.. but is any of that my fault?? you angry fine so be it.. but cant you see we are already trying our best to get the requisites ready for the procedure.. its not the pt is dying or anything.. just because you want to be chop chop and get ur things done quickly doesnt you can just vent ur anger anywhere and on anyone.. nd since you can talk so much how about gng to prepare everything yourselves then!! you drs dun even bother to clear up the dressing trolleys after you are done and leave it by the corridor to let the nurses to do your dirty job.. nvm.. tahan.. worse still, nv even bother to tell us then we kenna scolded by sister!! seriously, dr is just being all knowledge-y.. pls lahx.. be a human and care for ur fellow colleagues can! some of you dun even bother to clear the sharps and nurses get pricked because of you ppl.. when RMS happens, you say its not you.. not you then who?? nurses can do these procedures mehx.. nurses can take blood for blood culture mehx.. can do pleural tap, abdo tap, wadever invasive procedures mehx?? and till the end you couldnt even say you're sorry.. well im sorry to say, you dun deserve to be a doctor at all.. i wonder how you even got thru medical school.. all those interviews you must have been thru during med school, i think the interviewers must have been blind or something.. seriously, you gonna get it real bad tmr when my ssn has a talk with your consultant, and i and my fren will still be waiting for our apologies..

nv met a dr like her and i felt like freaking killing her.. went to the prep room to look for the bloody syringe and in my anger i slammed the doors.. urgh!!! good thing no one was around except for haslinda.. there is a limit to my tolerance you noe.. the only other dr to shouted at me suddenly, apologised to me almost immediately after that and i perfectly understand that she wasnt shouting at me but just so happened that i was there at that moment.. i understand that ppl have their bad moments but hey, just so you noe, dun forget to apologise to the person you are screaming to man.. they have feelings to you noe..

really couldnt take it and i kept whining to my mum throughout dinner.. why are there drs like that.. there is more to just doing skills and prescribing medications.. just as you are good in your profession, we are good in ours too.. the only difference is the job title.. you are a doctor and we are nurses.. but we are every good as you are!


can they please have "manners" as a core module in medical school!!

a new beginning also means that there will be an ending for it.. prcp is ending soon.. in less than a week.. and that also means that thats the end of poly life.. happy as i may be, i dun want things to end.. i hate endings.. the ppl i spent the last 3 months with during prcp, my prcp-mates, my awesome colleaguesat work who helped me so much in the past 3 months and with whom i had so much fun with, everything is gng to become a past next week onwards.. now thats sad.. and i hate it..

soon after one and a half months we are all gonna start work and then its gonna be harder than ever to meet up.. even then it will rarely be the entire bunch of us.. haiz.. treasure the moments ppl..

past few days at work was good and very fun.. im making the most of it.. hehe.. was super close to getting a distinction for my 12th week appraisal.. haiz.. saddening.. but well, an A is good enuf too.. but hell man, i keep whining about it esp since i know i was actually given a dist and it got taken away.. damned! hoping that the combined grades from wk 4 and wk12 would be good too..

my preceptor is gng for tonsillectomy(removal of the tonsils) on monday.. really hope she gets well soon.. i din even noe it was her bdae the other day and she was sick.. so sad..

finally bought my bumble bee water bottle.. super happy!! yay! bought another one too cuz it was too nice to miss.. so double yay!!

bkk trip is confirmed plus chopped.. 26-30th march.. cant wait.. apparently bro is oso gng bkk during that period but haven confirmed yet.. expecting a great time with the girls!!! triple yay!!

for the record, the bottom part of the previous post is not for my supposed bf.. i dun even have a bf so how to write such things for him.. everyone keeps asking me.. and ya the answer is no.. its just about someone thats all.. dun bother asking who..

i want another getaway.. preferably me alone or with 1 or 2 other close frens.. not too many or else it will be chaotic and messy.. to somewhere ulu and away from civilisation, into the countryside maybe for a month or 2.. back to basics.. staying in a flat house made out of wood, gng to the river to catch things to eat, killing a chicken for dinner(ok.. maybe not that, its way too gross and i can bear to kill something to eat), soaking in the culture of another place, meet new ppl and make new frens, enjoy the breath-taking views on this planet. watching the sunrise and set and go to places less travelled and learning new things that you cant learn just from books or attending lessons in school, sitting on top of a mountain and looking at things from a bird's eye view, paragliding, skiing, sky diving(im scared of heights but i do wanna try just for the adrenaline rush).. and maybe just maybe, experience some natural disasters.. im not psycho but its def something different from normal.. experiencing something that cannot be faked.. just doing things that are relaxing and not using too much of my braincells.. slow paced life.. thats wad i want, even if its for a month or 2.. life in sg is way too fast for our own good.. everything is done chopchop so much so that sometimes things are done without thinking.. i want slow slow slow paced.. it will be hard to adapt to but hey its worth a try.. i could give up internet, facebook, blogging, drama-ing.. all i want it my hp, camera and mp3.. at my current stage, this is impossible.. hopefully, after my 3 yrs of work life, i can do something like that b4 cont studying.. if only i can be like kenny.. off to another whole a place alone without a care in the world, he went to turkey btw for an entire month..